And welcome back to my next installment of:

STUFF I HATE

Today, I write about Trader Joe's. For those of you not in 'The Know,' Trader Joe's, or 'TJ's' is a reasonably priced specialty grocery store that focuses on organic and free-range foods. I like it for it's good produce and really great pre-made dinners.

So, what's the problem, you ask?

Well, the problem is one thing: The customers.

Every day, every single time I visit TJ's, the aisles are packed with a bunch of hemp-wearing, unshaven, pot-smoking, air-headed, granola-eating, bongo-beating brain-dead asshole EX-HIPPIES who can't seem to grasp the concept of "MOVE THE FUCK OVER FOR 10 FRIGGIN SECONDS SO I CAN GRAB SOME GODDAMN SPINACH."

Now, don't get me wrong - I have no problem with ex-hippies. I mean, I am the child of one. I just prefer the ones who ditched the hemp, grabbed a bra, snorted some coke and bought themselves a minivan during the late 80's. It's the ones that still think it's 1968 and have killed so many brain cells over the last 40 years that they are no longer capable of pushing a shopping cart without JAMMING IT INTO MY *$%&^*) ANKLES, that I hate.

Oh, and one last thing:

It's 2006. TAKE A FRIGGIN BATH AND WASH OFF THAT PUTRID PATCHOULI SHIT!

Thanks. better now.